A PROVERBS 31 WOMAN

A delicate act of balance

• Proverbs 31: 10 "Who can find a virtuous woman, for her price is far above rubies.”

• How do I emulate such an awesome woman?? Proverbs 31:10-31, presents an amazing Godly woman, who is definitely a hard act to follow! She is both inspiring but also intimidating to someone like me. I am not a wife nor a mother. Coming from my very rowdy and rebellious youth, I am the last person you would consider a Proverbs 31 woman ! (and yet, God is crafty, read on!)

• I have enough street smarts to be a micro-entrepreneur...but I am not well- known nor held up with such honor.

• The woman extolled in Proverbs 31 is three things: An honored wife, a mother, and a businesswoman. I grew up in the Bible and liked the Proverbs 31 description, but I never really understood the businesswoman verses in it, that speak of her skill in the realm of commerce. I now see in my Elder years, through my own years of effort, that her business endeavors were pursued to help her family and promote their well-being, a truly honorable endeavor.

  Her skills and gifts are both compassionate and logical, not at all easy to balance.

  She cares lovingly for her family, covering them warmly with comforting fabrics and attends to them to make certain they are blessed. She lends stable support to her husband in his honorable influence in the group of leaders in the community. She also has what I call “business smarts”, in that she has core business skills, which include this: "she considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands, she plants a vineyard, " ( verse 16) and also , verse 18, "she perceives that her merchandise is good; her candle goes not out by night." There are other verses as well, that describe her business acumen.

  The section describing her definitely presents a diligent business person, with the home and care of family being the first place of business. Her own family is the core of her efforts. I would imagine that many tiny “home businesses” are created in the realm of caring for family and having a partnership with your loved ones!

  I do not feel remotely equal to the woman described in the last chapter of Proverbs, a wise but stern book to begin with! I did not formally marry and sorrowfully dispatched both my children through abortion back in 1973. Broken by sadness and driven by the ice cold realm of rebellion, I gave up so much.

  The pressure on women to step away from family and join in the delight of business (deep sarcasm here...) is formidable in 2025. It is often said that business is a type of war and I sadly concur. I do fortunately, however, see cracks around the edges, as the empty fortress is having its hold broken over women's psyches.

  This does not mean all women do well as wives and mothers, but the corporate world is not particularly warm and fuzzy. It would never have taken ME in!

• Where does an eccentric oddball like me, fit?? I came in late, Mom giving birth to me three months after she turned 39, way back in 1952. My Dad was absolutely less than thrilled to have his wife expecting another child (when he did not want the two boys he already had) and pressured my mom to have a “d and c” (quiet abortion done with no fanfare, back in 1952, called a " dilation and curettage".) Nevertheless, Mom refused to abort me and I stumbled in, late as usual.

• As I have mentioned before in my writings here on Substack, the sudden deaths of both my Mom ( drastic stroke) and one older brother (Vietnam War) between 1966 and 1968 in my early teens, felled me and broke my faith in God, as I followed the unwise path of rebellion instead of bringing my sorrow directly to God. 35 years as a Prodigal were not exactly the greatest of stabilizing factor to a wounded tumbleweed. I finally fell back Home but remain a " late bloomer."

  I do "get" it, how young women in 2025 are ambivalent about marriage and children. I felt the same way, as the two abortions I had back in August and October 1973, were not pleasant. One was from a one night stand, the guy never knew I got pregnant and I never saw him again. The other was from a new boyfriend, who wanted to get married and have the child...but he was WAY jealous and I knew I could not marry him. He did not pressure me to marry him and did not pressure me to not have the abortion.

  Not the greatest of life plans, this! Stumbling through life, I would not recommend it.

  I have always wistfully admired the woman of Proverbs 31, as she seems so stable and accomplished...and all I have is untidy scraps and bits and pieces. I have not asked God for a long life and would rather go Home sooner than later.

  While I'm still here, I do sincerely want to offer encouragement to young women, to partner with God and His Son! They contain the core of the honorable and courtly men who would treat a woman with dignity and respect, not as a conquest.

• I came across a Pin on one of my Pinterest pages, that spoke of how amazing it would be for a young man to take a girl to church with him instead of trying to take her to bed, to offer a concern for her soul instead of lustfully treating her as a conquest. How utterly revolutionary would that be...a return to "courting" and respect for the soul above the body. How starving youth must be...and I understand that, as I was the same in my own youth...lonely and sorrowful and driven and thoroughly lied to by the thief we call Satan.

• Since I am a “direct experience survivor” of the sexual revolution of my Boomer youth, I fully understand the emptiness and overwhelming, driving sorrow of it all. It is not "freedom" and not “fun”, I assure you. It is marketing!

  Proverbs 31:10-31, however, is a good thing to aspire to, as one who nurtures and cares for her family, not as drudgery or duty but as a genuine love and joy with those she loves. God actually knows things...and He is willing to share His knowledge and understanding with you, for free! A “deal” with Papa God and His Son Jesus Christ, is a much better deal that all the temporary riches of the world. It is God Who drew me to Substack, as a place I could finally create and write my own visceral and emotional life experience, to hopefully help even one other person, avoid the mistakes I made!

  P.S. Check out the wonderful Substack "Biblical Womanhood", which presents many excellent ideas and counsel on lovingly raising your children ( to not be barbarians) and to care for your family. What a dear lady she is!

  Wendy Elizabeth Williams Friday, April 4, 2025

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