BEAUTY WITHOUT SEDUCTION

Power held in Reserve

Psalm 26: 6: “I will wash mine hands in innocency...”

Isaiah 61:3: “To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.”

You know what?

It is OK to simmer and not to constantly boil...

Clothing is an unspoken language and in recent years, women’s clothing especially has become deranged and debased, a total forgetting of the spirit, but rather an obsessive focus on the physical. It is worse than I have ever seen it, in my many years of loving fabric, garments, presentation and beauty. I do not love the licentious template, not one bit. The repercussions are unpleasant and they happen when you can least handle them. Unwanted attention is the least of it..as actions can spin out in uncontrolled directions and lay invisible land mines across your path. I know this, as I have walked this myself.

This obsession has fanned out in noxious ways, to add even more pressure on young women to relentlessly pursue SEXY at all costs. The cost is staggering and I’m angry or as they say “righteously peeved.”

Well, kids, in light of the fact that I’m already old and relatively invisible, nothing to lose with me stepping out and throwing down my own gauntlet and offering the overwhelming suggestion...that beauty can indeed exist without the demand of seduction.

This does NOT imply to “ let yourself go” or to not care for your physical self. This does not trample on the love between husband and wife and the need to care for yourself and the one you love. This simply speaks that we have gone too far. It negatively affects little girls as well as young women.

I seek beauty to simply feel beautiful for myself, not to draw male attention. True beauty can feed the soul and spirit!

This does not imply that I hate men or want to ignore my “ looks”. This means one invisible Elder woman has had enough of beauty being hijacked for obsession, the slandering of innocence and worshiping the physical and ephemeral above the realm of the Spirit!

I will say that dignity lives large in my 73 1/2 year old psyche! While I don’t want to be “drab or dowdy” , I am not on the hunt for attention especially as the fashion “ diktat” says you are to offer fealty to the demand to be “alluring” and a “hot girl”. Hot gets cold quickly and the “ next hot thing” summarily kicks you out! Talk about what’s “ in” or “ out “ , it is obsession, plain and simple. The female pecking order, which I have discussed in recent writings, is a formidable foe, dismissive and unpleasant and can seriously trample the psyche of some and that includes me. I’ve bern stomped and bullied before.

I have lived over seven decades, a phenomenal miracle in itself. I pursued men quite directly for ten years of my youth and got a whole lot of sorrow for it ( Sexually transmitted diseases , had two abortions in 1973, more tears and heartbreak than most, being an empath and feeling emotions so deeply.) I used to scare people in my youth, with my intensity! I was not drop dead gorgeous as per the stringent beauty standards...I just had plenty of intensity and focus, a “ gaze”. Worked for me but left my heart empty and smashed.

For the awful battles raging between male and female, I long to pour ice water on the intensity of overpowering lust and ask people to simply take a step back and truly examine the darkness overwhelming us. From my own frontline experiences, lust utterly does not satisfy. Pleasure is remarkably brief and then, just like addiction, the desire returns, empty again. Believe me, I have been there!

All humans seek to be loved, respected, appreciated and valued. With the piles of cynicism pouring out, the selling of pornography, the castigation and condemnation of others, the stereotyping and “ othering” , the modern world is awash in sorrow and anger. “ Getting laid “ or “ getting my rocks off” is not an admirable goal, I hate to tell you. Both men and women pursue that sad foray and I am here to testify that IT DOES NOT SATISFY. I did the exact same thing with at least 50 different people in my twenties, a seriously dubious achievement that I deeply regret and have profoundly repented of.

In my Elder years, I desire to be gracious, kind, comforting, elegant without being arrogant. I will say the presence of the quality of “ KIND” is in dire need of supply and perhaps we could ramp down the sexpot about 99% right now.

My lifelong love of garments has drawn me to the love of true beauty...color, symmetry, harmony, soothing comfort, being at ease and not rapacious, not hungry and spiritually empty.

The sorrowful legacy of huge $$$ weddings, all the rabid externals, the ridiculous expense when so many marriages end in chaos...just make me weep.

The surface does not fill the empty spots in your soul.

The sorrowful phenomenon of “ incels”, the hatred stirred up between men and women, the blaming others for the empty heart and soul...no wonder the birth rate is falling and some brokenhearted resort to violence to assuage the sadness in their emotions. Loneliness can literally kill you!

Young men, I speak to you directly as an Elder woman: you are loved, your gifts and strength and courage and enthusiasm are needed. You have an Elder Brother in Jesus Christ, Who advocates for you! He does not scold, He does not condemn, He calls you to fellowship and repentance and indeed, FAMILY. He will walk with you through this life of battle and into Eternity with Him and His Father. You will have an Advocate and Savior, Who gives you natural gifts and the ability to love and be loved. God will lead you to an honorable woman to be your wife, just partner with Him in this, step by step, you need not be alone!

I have to guard against despair...although I can say, clothing can indeed be a REFUGE. “Power held in reserve” means women in more calming clothing can focus on the healing balm and encouragement they know so well. This can fan out to help so many others!

Cool off about a thousand degrees, cover up the revealings of your sadness, sit down next to your Papa God and His dear Son, the Lord Jesus Christ...His healing balm soothes the sorrowful lonely tears and despair, step by step.

I can rest in His arms...and He knows things I do not.

A phrase Holy Spirit gave me during the writing of this piece, was “ I long to be ‘loved-on by a garment, wrapped in innocency.” “ Wrap myself in innocency” is directly from a Psalm 26 of King David, who rambled and rumbled with steep emotions up and down...abd poured out his soul to God, A LOT. I have truly had only a few garments in my life that I felt “loved on” in the wearing of them...including a dark blue wool cloak I made in high school, as a bastion against the terrible grief that engulfed me after the sudden deaths of two members of my immediate family in two years in my teens. That cloak wrapped me up in a loving and protective embrace. I also felt that in my faithful barn coats, both of which carried me in a warrior embrace, all through the rough and tumble of my leasing agent career in San Francisco, for about 17 years. Feeling ‘loved on’ by a garment...an unusual feeling but very real and very tangible and one that can help carry you through a day, protective and truly a refuge.

I recommend it.

I also recommend the video clip from Peter Jackson‘s epic three part movie phenomenon of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, with the Return of the King, part 3. The Ride of the Rohirrim, the phenomenal battle scene of the Riders of Rohan assembling en masse, in defense of the battle of Gondor and Minas Tirith, King Theoden’s rallying of his brothers in battle is one for the ages, as the Elder King tells his warriors to “ fear no darkness “ as they charge into battle against formidable enemies (please note, the Rohirrim wins, even if some fall in battle!) I did not include a hyperlink for this movie clip, did not know of legal stuff…so just go to YouTube, type in “ the ride of the Rohirrim” and watch about 4 minutes of courage and honor on display. May it lift your spirits, as it did mine! Take courage!

Amen to the spiritual warfare we are in, defending the good and the honorable against the dark. Much to do!

Wendy Elizabeth Williams, Friday, May 29, 2026

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--Consider donating any amount from $1 and up on my Ko-fi page at Ko-fi.com/wendyelizabethwilliams. You can donate one time, periodically or monthly, as you see fit. I am also enjoying writing a shorter weekly piece on my Ko-fi page, focusing mainly on my lifelong love of fabric, garments, beauty and the centuries- long battles between men and women. After I get my weekly Substack longer piece up on Friday nights, I also place my shorter Ko-fi piece up on Notes. Tonight’s short piece on Ko-fi continues with my theme of desiring to dress without being provacative or seductive, ramping down the rampant vulgarity that has so overtaken women’s clothing. “Bring back the lady!”

--Please pray for me! Thank you, Wendy