STEELY SAWMILLS, NOT SIMMERING SOUP

The Blunt versus the Bland

• —John 10:10: “The thief cometh not but for to steal, and to kill and to destroy. I am come that they might have life, and they might have it more abundantly.”

  —Romans 3:23: “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.”

  —Psalm 23:4 “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for thou art with me, thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.”

• I grew up in gritty, earthy Southern Oregon high-elevation timber country, evergreens and woodworking, sawdust, railroads and plain spoken working-class. So much structure is shaped from beautiful wood in the good smells, the leaves, the pitch. Directly across from the local library in my hometown, was a sawmill...loud, dusty and formidably male. You don’t argue with a sawmill, you respect it and give it a wide berth. It is one of the blunt shaping functions of the material world...taking one element and shaping it into another, foundational needed structure.

• Now, in the midst of a time of despair, God is teaching me ways to walk through and endure and He is right here next to me...

• I’m a very strange bunch of oddments: an empath to the overwhelmed ( a fellow...), a compassionate one who is sometimes absorbs the struggles of others, a sensitive soul who needs solitude more than socializing, and a recovering VERY SHARP TONGUE that has scared off many a person over my 73 years. Maybe that’s why I call myself a blunt girl.

• Sometimes a “ lulling” does not work. The sweet or soothing or “ soupy” may at times, be too sweet for me.

• While I do not respond well to “ tough love,” as I am not willfully misbehaving, I also strangely seem to do better with short doses of bluntness and directness. Please note this is NOT from others towards me, (scolding!) nor physical force, not against others or self. I KNOW when I have missed it and I clearly hear the nudge of Holy Spirit in this!! I repent quickly. This is instead an act of shoving the devil off the cliff, THAT kind of force!

• I don’t need to be harangued, I need to hit something...like the thief that comes to steal, to kill, and to destroy, as Christ so bluntly spoke of in John 10:10. This is not the hitting of a person, this is raw and primal SPIRITUAL warfare. I have never had a physical fight with or from anyone in my entire life. Arguments, verbal fisticuffs, definitely. Verbal fencing, I used to be a master at it...but it becomes EXHAUSTING as you get older.

• I have often been in the emotional “pit” of depression recently, a generational malady and even with wonderful and helpful prayers from Brothers and Sisters in Christ, which I asked for, which I need, I am pretty sure it will have to be Papa God and myself teaming up to fully “get me outta here!” No, I do NOT want to be on depression meds…I am vulnerable to Pharma. NO! The pressure shifts from from day to day a bit...but Papa and I are walking this road TOGETHER. Just like Psalm 23 says, “yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, fot thou art with me...”

• It may very well be that fully “getting me outta here” comes together either on my last few days of life in this physical realm or once I actually go Home. I guess I have to be at peace about it and just slog on and keep moving, despite the mud and mess, AKA life! Eternity awaits me, with God and His Son, the angels of God’s light, and those dear ones who have gone on ahead of me, waiting for me! I will have work to do in Heaven, holy and honorable work! I surely would like to help even a handful of dear souls to find the profound help in trouble that is God and His Son. God does not guarantee smooth sailing, He is with you in the storm!

• All of us are shaped much by the tumult of life...the unsmooth, the rocky, the craggy, the pitted, the potholed, the failures of self and others. I seem to learn best from the rough-hewn, in short doses, sprinter temperament that I am. Too smooth...is too smooth...and somehow suspect to my non- trusting self (also described as a curmudgeon. )

• One of my most primal childhood memories was hearing my mom crying. She was also her own kind of empath-warrior blend, as both a warrior (a Registered Nurse trained in the 1930s) and a deeply compassionate and feeling woman. Her emotions felled her, to some degree. She prayed for a daughter after two sons, I stumbled in late when she was pushing 40, I had nearly 14 yrs with her...and she died overnight of a massive stroke, that possibly was intensified by deep emotional distress. I am steeply aware of the power of emotion, to help and to harm.

• One of my defenses with emotion is to withdraw and that is a double-edged sword, as I do crave solitude and yet I can get emotionally battered by the devil when alone. Since I no longer shove my sadness down with marijuana, ( not for 24 years) the starkness of emotion is very clear...

• Attempting to balance my emotions is like both a push and a pull. Half of me desperately longs for Heaven, to serve God side by side and be out of this awful pain, like 50-50, go or stay. A recent night was 90-10, toward Home. I am not suicidal and would never harm myself...but an exhaustion of spirit does sap my battle cruiser. I’ve had enough.

• While I have enough logic and common sense to keep the basics afloat ((roof, food and clothing), I remain an empath, a person who feels things deeply.

• And yet...GOD IS WITH ME. That truly is the core of the faith of God and His Son, “ I will never leave you nor forsake you. “ All the good works alone will not gain you entrance into heaven! Only the shed blood sacrifice of Christ on Calvary can do that. This is combined with our own sincere and heartfelt repentance and willingness to listen deeply to God day by day and gradually change the things He asks you to change. This is refinement and the arduous walk of faith.

• Christ knew the wiles of the devil...sneaky, without truth, unclean, fetid, cruel, lying, a THIEF.

  I have met the devil and his works before and I won’t return. He gave up his place in Heaven as anointed cherub, an archangel, all for pride and hubris, what a stupid mistake. I’m not following that foolish loser!

• God towers above him in every way. Heck, Christ Himself walked right in to the devil’s pit and took the keys of hell and of death from him!

• My tendency is toward my wish of a WEW “super duper solution, my handy-dandy tool box ‘o fixins’ did this, this’ll work fer sure...solving this is just waitin’ round the corner and all my troubles will go away.”

• Umm... “May I have a word, plz?”, ( says Papa God)

• WEW, have you looked at the world of 2026???

  Yes, yes I have..

  Hence my problem and discouragement, not just others, but “ meself” , struggling so blasted much. Some people are just so accomplished…I am not, I’m a survivor.

• Let go? Give up? Tempted...but...Nope!

  Hands and knees crawler here, the plodder towards Eternity with Papa and Son, finally turning my rebellion into good feed rather than bad fodder. Trust me, I’m an expert!

• This week at my Wednesday church Discipleship church group, we had a spirited and sobering discussion about...INTERCESSORS.

• Guess what I am...???

  An Intercessor is a person who prays and one who stands in the gap for others Holy Spirit guides me to...and guess what?? Intercessors have a target on them, threatening as they are to the devil’s realm. Hmm…puzzle pieces put together…

• Hence why Psalm 91, Isaiah 54:17, Ephesians 6 with the full armor of God, every single solitary day, plus my personal Guardian Angels and the Host of Heaven warring angels who are dispatched by God Himself.

• This does not guarantee no battles or even no scrapes or wounds...BUT this means you do NOT fight the blasted battles alone. Despite the scrapes and scratches and blunders of real life, it actually works. The Christian faith is a warrior faith all the way. It challenges all of you and yet, you have HELP, day by day!! You don’t even have to clean up or comb your hair!

• I may not be the brightest shining light, kids, but my light is NOT OUT. It may flicker...but it is not doused, nor out.

• As long as God gives me breath in my lungs, I will keep moving forward, slow but sure. I may have plenty of stops along the way, but when you repent and follow God and His Son Jesus Christ, life is like a pilgrimage toward the Eternal Home of Heaven, through heights, depths, thick, thin, tumult and times of peace. What Christ went through for ALL OF US...we cannot repay Him, but we can follow Him, even in our stumbles and stick close to Him like a burr. I am not leaving His side, tied to his horse. He does not demand perfection, He seeks your heart!

  Wendy Elizabeth Williams Friday, March 13, 2026

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  --Consider donating any amount from $1 and up, to my Ko-fi page at Ko-fi.com/wendyelizabethwilliams. You can donate one time, periodically or monthly, as you feel guided. I am also doing one shorter writing piece per week on my Ko-fi page, focusing on my lifelong love of all things fabric, garments, beauty and the centuries-long battles between the two tribes of humanity, male and female. Each week after I get my longer piece up on Substack on Friday nights, I then place my Ko-fi piece also on Notes. This week, I am continuing my fascination with the amazing realm of garments and the powerful emotions clothes can engender. I have spoken in recent pieces about my sincere puzzlement over why some (often famous) women seem to need to flaunt their physical selves! It remains a source of sadness for me, as letting it all hang out is not a good way to help yourself, it places you in a vulnerable state. I am writing this week on Ko-fi, more about the power and emotions of garments, how they made you feel and obviously how you present yourself to the world. “In the realm of Threads”, or as Papa God told me last night, “threads will save your life!” (He was speaking of my lifelong love of all things fabric and garments and my beginning to write more about the realm of good and blessed garments and how that will feed my soul!)

  --Please pray for me! Thank you, Wendy