THE HIGH MOUNTAIN OF A VALLEY DWELLER

Look up, not down!

Psalm 121:1-2 “I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence comes my help. My help comes from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.”

Lamentations 2:22-23 “It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning, great is thy faithfulness.”

I am not generally cheerful when I first wake up!

Well, on a recent morning upon awakening, a phrase popped into my head and I immediately began to laugh:

“ Why in the flaming gas clouds am I not a dynamo??”

This was a perfect sardonic query, which I cannot fully answer. I do actually have my theories: I entered the world late, with my mom three months into her 40th year when I stumbled in, cursed in the womb by dad, who did NOT want another kid and pressured mom to abort me (1952...) Mom dies overnight of a massive stroke in 1966, a brother is killed in Vietnam in 1968, the spirit of grief parked its bony butt on my soul and resisted leaving.

Every single person on earth has at least some elements of a personal tale of woe, the proverbial brick wall with their name on it, something that tails your life and troubles you, often repeatedly. Some get with it and through it and over it and conquer it... but not I, not all of it, by a long shot.

And yet...here I am, still breathing at 73, still traversing in the creek here in the valley, never having visited the mountainn top for more than a mo. I must have somethin’ left to do, yes? I may just have a ministry of sorts in the valley, a place of yes, familiarity and also, a place of many brokenhearted, of which I am monumentally acquainted.

I may not be an achiever, but I am definitely a survivor.

I personally think many of us who have been poor or had protracted financial battles, feel like an orphan or a cast-off, an in-the-way impediment who just can’t “get with the game!” Scolding certainly does not help.

Each of us does have our life purpose, however torn and worn and scarred and scraped.

No one is always serene out there. Scratching, scraping, stumbling, meandering, strolling ( off a cliff??), missing the exit (again), making the wrong turn (another again), putting on the shoe that doesn’t fit, cramming ourselves into a smidge of a corner too small. Cram this, shove this down, rearrange the deck chairs to please the tour director, never mind the tour director waving the sheaf of papers at you that say “over here, dear, you don’t fit in THERE”....

The heavy judgments of the world, the condemnation, the chaos, are threatening to swamp your emotions yet once again, these can definitely deluge you. This is where you learn “head down in survival mode,” otherwise known as looking down! This is part of the core of financial lack, based on my own direct and visceral experience.

I have tried more times than I can remember...fighting to find my niche.

Compared with all those shiny new “line-free” faces in supposed perfection... (AI???), no thanks, not real.

Nope, flunked perfection school.

Seat of the pants frequent-flyer here, improviser and the summary execution of “learn by doing”... of which I am somewhat of a master.

What the heck kind of question is that dynamo question, anyway??? Dynamo? Flaming gas clouds?? What are they? It is either my subconscious or Holy Spirit making me laugh...which He does so wonderfully and frequently. I need to laugh, this is true! He laughs me up and out to that next step toward His higher realm.

I’m a “too deep” person, seeing meaning of some kind in every rock and twig. I am not lighthearted by nature, I think and simmer and ruminate and rumble...and that is generally not the best plan to build a prosperous life.

Do I have the soul of a poet? Yes, 100%, even though I write prose, not poems.

“Lighten up”...how many times has that phrase been hurled at me... that shaming pile of condemnation? Let me get my calculator...

How many of us feel stuck in the valley, seeming to never escape or withdraw, planting our pup tent even on sharp rocks, as we dont envision soft grass? Herein lies plenty of the problem. Inner view colored by less-than-light... God, the Master of all, help me!!

Survivor, I am. Highly intuitive, I am. Learned by doing, 24/7, I have and still do. I am quite intelligent, resourceful, an empath who feels the pain of others, compassionate, very street-smart and still a bit rough around the edges, real and gnarly at times.

Making peace with my wordsmith gift is a huge chunk of this ...and my fondest desire is to bless others out of darkness and toward God and His Son through the realm of words...

God does not promise all smooth or unbothered roads, as we ourselves, the human race, are the ones who made most of the royal mess! ( Of course the devil helped…)

I may not be where I want to be in God, not where I “should” be. At least I came back to God, from years as a rebellious Prodigal, at least I’m somewhere in the Lord and I’m better than I used to be. Something is most assuredly better than nothing.

God gave me a phrase last night in our nightly fellowship...and that phrase was a soul-stirrer:

“The valley gives foundation to the mountains.”

Only Papa God would give me that higher view...that the ground is where mountains rest, before they soar to the sky. “Look up, not down”...He often reminds me. Gently, lovingly, relentlessly.

Look up, not down, even if I am grounded in the valley. He does not demand perfection, He seeks my heart...God is with me always, even to the end of the world. Serve where you are at any given moment. Keep walking towards God, one step, one day.

Wendy Elizabeth Williams, Friday, January 30, 2026

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