TO SPITE THE SPITE

A Battle Royale

• 1 Samuel 22: 1-2: “David therefore departed thence, and escaped to the cave Adullam, and when his brethren heard it, they all went down thither to him. And every one that was in distress, and every one that was in debt, and everyone that was discontented, gathered themselves unto him; and he became a captain over them...”

• It will come as no surprise to any who follows God and His Son...but the devil is a bully. He threw away his heavenly gifts of “anointed cherub” because he let pride overcome him, he wanted to take God’s power for himself. What a waste...

• May I repeat that statement? The fallen angel, tossed out of Heaven by Archangel Michael, he lives to steal, to kill and to destroy here on Earth.

• While he will be the loser in Eternity, he is not completely cast down in the earthly realm, not yet.

  He still casts SPITE...the desire to break others because they do not worship him. He once tried to get Christ Himself to fall down and worship him...worse than dense! (He failed!) He aimed that spite in my direction last weekend.

• Following God and His Son is at once blessed and also very difficult. On one side, you have fellowship and relationship in the Household of God, a monumental thing. No material possession can come close to knowing your Creator, the One Who spoke you into being and gave you wonderful gifts, abilities and skills that are blessed to be yours in the world, to help self and others. You do not need to be perfect, only willing to partner with God, in the transformation of your heart and spirit, bit by bit. When you are humble and repentant, you look forward to spending Eternity with God, His Son, the angels who did not rebel...and your beloveds who have gone on Home before you. What a party of life eternal that will be...fellowship, honorable work, being part of the realm of God forever!

• On the other hand, that fallen angel hates you.

  I am not accustomed to being hated. For one who has elements of blunt in my temperament, I do not seek battles. I have learned to curb my sharp tongue and think before I hurl verbal barbs.

• A few days ago, I had an steep emotional meltdown, an awful manic attack of deep sorrow and despair, like the emotional pup tent I used to live in most of the time. Like...freaking flippers..I cannot do this world...I have tried and tried and tried...I don’t fit in to 99% of the material realm...I’m getting older, I have no large sums of $$$...I run from rent mountain to power bill to food to...rent again. At least I am not in debt...

• As I make the slow walking stumble through God’s profoundly cleansing Refiner’s Fire, the reality revealed is twofold: what depths of despair I grew accustomed to living in and the progress I have made in exiting that unhappy place. Not out all the way, not yet...but progress!

  Truly one step, one day.

• For as blunt as I am about the staggering price of unrepentant sin and separation from God for Eternity...I am not spiteful. I do not hurl spite at any. I truly have curbed my temper.

• I remain two things: a true empath, one who feels things deeply, especially corded to the sadness of humans. Just as Christ was called “ a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief “ , I can deeply relate. This is real and viscerally so.

  I also remain a blunt 73 year old woman, sitting on too much grief still and ...seeing the mess of the world and fomenting my inner Control Freak, par excellence. I can look back on the tumult of my 73 years in both sorrow and objectivity. Some nights are just awful, as per a few days ago...and others, somewhat more smooth.

• Why...it’s “Control Freak Empaths”, the movie, part 999,999, yes?

  Trust me, you do not want a part in this movie.

• Faith is hard...but I can tell you without quarter, going your own way, not at all good. As a Prodigal who ran for 35 years and a lost sheep that Christ left to find...the tears flow and would fill an ocean...

  Going my own way was disastrous...but GOD IS NOT THE AUTHOR OF DISASTER.

  The devil is.

  Remember?

• I felt in the late night last Saturday night, after asking online for prayer, “ if I make it through the night, I will pick my Cross back up in the morning.”

• One dear friend and fellow Substack writer, gifted poet and photographer Deborah Hewitt, “My Unframed Life”, wrote an extremely powerful piece in the last month or so called “One Dusty Hoof Forward” accompanied by powerful music from SYML, “Symmetry”, one which hit my soul like a projectile. In it, she quoted from Galations 6, where Apostle Paul exhorts the Galation Christians to both “ bear each other’s burdens “...but also reminds them to carry their own weight” essentially. I get the dichotomy here...have been on both sides...but understand fully that while Brothers and Sisters in Christ can pray for each other, we must walk also alone...with God and Son helping us. Thus is the core of the depth of the Christian faith...partnering with God to transform ourselves more into a likeness of His dear Son.

• Difficult?? Yes. Nothing more difficult in this world. Nothing more rewarding.

  This world is hard. I am not much good at it, except as a survivor.

• Just allow yourself to “ flop on the couch with Papa” and pour out your heart to Him every single day. Get it off your soul. Ask for His help. Repent quickly when you miss it. Listen to the still small voice of Holy Spirit. He knows things, He has things for you...He will guide you with no ditches to hamper you. You have gifts that God gave you, gifts and experiences that no one else has!

  This place is temporary.

  Use well the days...they fly by...

  Wendy Elizabeth Williams Friday, February 20, 2026

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• —Please pray for me!! Thank you, Wendy