A FLARE OF TWO:

A Survivor versus a Partnership

• Isaiah 54:2: "Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations; spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes;"

  I John 4:18: "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love."

• God can teach on the tallest mountain, in the deepest valley, in the light and in the dark. Sometimes I argue with Him (pardon my dummkopf, Papa...) but He still loves me and still proceeds with what He is teaching me to do, regardless of my “discussion." He just smiles and then does exactly what I was arguing about! (Sigh...)

• At my dinner table earlier this week, at about 7:45 PM, there was a sudden power outage in my apartment building (this is Northern California, land of such things!) With enough daylight to finish my food ( salmon and potato), I ate the hot food and then went searching for the only candles I had, "tealights." Lighting one tiny spark, I got into the shower to wash off the day while hot water would still be in the h. w. heater. A quick wash, a quick dishes done, I planned my remaining evening ( sleep) as the power company had texted to say " lights on by about 4:15 AM." As per my usual "futzing" around, I managed to take some notes on upcoming writing pieces and even read a bit by tealight (charming, along with a magnifying glass!)

• After an hour, as daylight faded and tealight one was nearly out of tea...I carried tea one to the ceramic counter, to try and light a followup candle. Not being able to aim the lighter w/o singe-ing my fingertip, I aimed the tiny wick of tea two, toward the flame of tea one, hoping the wicks would meet for a second and ignite.

• Indeed. Well, not just ignite but FLARE!! I was startled to watch flame one essentially reach for wick two, and flare a flame to the new wick.

  FLARE?? What?? I'm no physics expert but from lighting candles over a lifetime, I have never seen a flame meet a wick in a flare like this!

• Momentarily stunned, I clearly heard Holy Spirit speak. His dear voice said, " The flare of two, one to another." Because I hang out daily with God, I have gradually gotten to know more about Him and I do recognize His voice! I also recognized the title for my new weekly Friday Substack piece! ( I told ya, God is creative!)

• Another deep W.E.W. sigh. One flame, however tiny, met a wick and ignition resulted. (By the way, power did come back on in two hours...thanks, P.G.E.)

  I do not know why Papa God repeatedly does this to this pile of arguing girl in her 7th decade, not a raving success at anything near earthly success, a "PH.D." in "survival and street smart and recovering cynical snarky", that's me. For seven and a half years in my nightly " flop on the couch" with Papa with notebook and pen at His behest, listening to Him, pouring out my heart, I have been growing in getting to know God, attempting to accept His love and provision and also attempting to manifest a tiny corner of understanding of how He works in my life.

  While I have had only one long term dear male companion in my 72 years, I never formally married and remain single, even while cherishing the years I have spent in friendship with one person. For all practical purposes, I remain alone with God and His Son.

• God keeps telling me, "On down the road, I have someone for you, a special person." He assures me this is in His timing and "no pressure".

• I'm freaking .

• I vociferously argue, ( politely) that I want to remain alone....and WHO would love ME? WHO would want me?? WHO would want me as a marriage partner?

  Ever tried arguing with God???

• You would think I would give up after awhile.

  Not me....and to no avail, of course...

• I don't feel beautiful! I am used to being alone! I am prickly! I cannot have a child, age 72 1/2! Celibate for a long time! Help-help-help!!! Oh, the things Papa God must have to listen to from all us wailers...I feel for Him...

• How to consider this unsettling, if gentle pronouncement from the One Who made me?? No remote clue here.

• I have a Christian friend whose young college-attending daughter just got engaged to a Godly young man. Their engagement is for one year, in the wise tradition of past times. This allows the couple time to pray together, to study the Bible together, to receive Pastoral counsel in advance of any marriage, and this used to be more of a requirement in the past. You were required to wait a few months before marriage could proceed. Less divorce, perhaps, as the realities of blending two lives together into the Godly "one flesh" male and female paradigm is not at all easy and needs patience and full grounding in the Bible and God's guidance day by day. Both man and woman must first be committed to God and His Son above all other things, that is foundational! A husband or wife, while one may love them, cannot fulfill the need that God alone can fulfill. He has to be placed first.

• An excellent paradigm...for young people! In the past tradition, there was no drunkenly being married by Elvis in Vegas, no " first try" wives or husbands, no off the cuff matrimony!! For Elders set in their ways??? Papa, I am too old, I am not open to much change, I am afraid... (Putting on my running shoes...)

  You cannot outrun God...and yet He will not force. I need to simmer and chew and grow first...

• What the heck is this bombshell landing on MISS Hidebound, 72 1/2 ???

  Kids, dunno...but I do know I can certainly continue to CLING to God with all my strength, as I most assuredly cannot find my way through life's mud and thickets, on my own...

• If only, if only, if only I had not wandered in stinkin' sorrowful rebellion for 35 years as a Prodigal to my Christian faith! This was truly one of the worst decisions I ever made and certainly a core reason for my own visceral Substack writing, otherwise known as "DON'T DO WHAT I DID, LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES!!!" Much of my life has been a warning. serious, not playful, sometimes even somber. “Lighten up” is a pejorative for me…

• From what modest bits I have learned from more closely hanging out with Papa for 7 1/2 years, He can " take" questions, sorrow and uncertainty. Main thing is BRING THE WHOLE MESSY PILE TO GOD EVERY SINGLE DAY! REPENT QUICKLY! GOT IT?? Repeat after the Blunt Oregon Girl, BRING THE MESS TO GOD, first! Seek His Face and counsel, knock on the door more than once, and ASK for help over and over and over again. Repetition is key, as it also builds strength. I desperately need this, as I give up too easily!

• God's teaching temperament is deep and profound. I never cease to be astonished at how he tailors the learnings to each of us, His sons and daughters who have repented of sin and asked God and His Son to partner with us and help us through the difficulties of life and into Eternity with Them. Since God sees into Eternity, He sees what we cannot and as we partner with Him day by day, we begin to hear and trust Him.

• What a concept...God is actually trustworthy and deserving of our trust!

  Last night, as I sat with notebook and pen for my nightly "hanging out with God" time, I heard Papa say "Self-image, dearest daughter, you and I are going to work on this. We will progress to whom you truly are and how we will work together to get the sorrow and sadness out of your soul. I'm an expert at this, W.E.W. , I know exactly what to do."

  Amen to that, Papa.

• Wendy Elizabeth Williams, Friday, June 13, 2025. ( LUCKY THIRTEEN, YES!)

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  --Finally, please pray for me, that I clearly hear the voice of Holy Spirit, as He is my writing coach! Thank you, Wendy