A HUNGER FOR THE CEREBRAL:

Clothing in a holy union of Left and Right Brain

Isaiah 61:3: "...to give unto them that mourn, beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness..."

Having been a life-long lover of all things fabric, garments and style, I sometimes wander into online fashion shows for women. A good number are accompanied by hard-driving rock and roll music and garments that are short, tight and very revealing. These are not remotely my taste, as I seek the more tempered presentation of the power of clothing. However, I recently found my way onto an extraordinary video of a young Haute Couture designer named Robert Wun, who presented a twenty-five minute show (season of Spring-Summer 2024-2025) that was peaceful, cerebral, mesmerizing, courtly, dignified and filled with the feminine magic that was not seduction! A difficult balance...but the cerebral overtook the rowdy in this event. The music was mysterious and "techno" and had a positive spirit to it. I was deeply moved by the way the garments moved to the classic cross-foot walk as the expert models strolled slowly, graciously and delicately in the mostly long and sweeping gowns, stunning in their amazing beauty. These were obviously not "grocery shopping" garments...but nevertheless, fed my soul. This can be the true inspiring power of garments.

Observing the utter thundering herd of intense obsession with sex and vulgarity in 2024, I have evolved, through pit and past trauma, to be an opposing rebel to this dissolute state of being. The damage to women and girls especially, has been profound. I am in righteous anger and intensive prayer mode for the remainder of my life, participating in the spiritual warfare battle of all battles, for the very spirit of humanity. This is not "force" over other people but this is also the primal "offensive force" of my own self-defense, for things of purity and modesty. Considering my own flagrant failure in this arena from my past...I see the irony...and yet feel compelled to fight the good fight against the filth threatening to trample dearness, tenderness and innocence. God did not make this trample, the devil did and I resist him. He beat me up enough in youth…and I am DONE in Elder age.

Based on what I unfortunately dived into in my Boomer youth, I experienced the lies of the devil, who speaks nothing but darkness and fully unfulfilled promises, especially to women. Drawn, pushed or shoved into the chaos of " sexual freedom", otherwise known as a giant pile of "crud", I became rambunctious, rowdy and joined what I call the " fellows and fellowship of NO!" I lost track of how many people I had sex with. I am not proud of that memory and hence, what I write about in my own Substack, much on "what not to do" and what my youthful actions cost me.

Ribald, raw, cynical, demanding and thrown headlong into the filthy molten pot of engulfing sexuality, there was no restraint, no discernment, and I got cast aside more times than I could count. I sadly did some casting of others as well. This is not remotely a good way to live. This was totally a realm of rugged emotion, too much right brain feeling and not enough balance of left brain logic to discern a better path. We need a balance between left brain and right brain!

Thank God for God! God is a most creative and excellent Teacher.

He also is what I affectionately refer to as a " Stealth Papa", One who can unexpectedly direct things to His kids that not only resonate with their core temperaments as He labors in partnership with us to refine us but also to affect our spirits in a positive and useful manner.

He catches us "off-guard" and hence why I call Him a Stealth Papa. I am certain it was He that led me to this amazing online fashion show of cerebral beauty and peace and just what I needed at that very moment (I shed tears...as also said large numbers of the commenters below the video!! I have never in all my years, seen this many commenters say they were in TEARS at a fashion show. It obviously touched a very deep and primal longing in women, for the reducing of seduction and a move to the more noble and honorable, the cerebral! )

For me, as an intensely emotional, empathic and sensitive soul who is deeply drawn to fabric, garments and the flow of " style", I am moved more by how I feel the world around me, things like color, shape, proportion, texture, sound.

I am grounded enough at 72 to have at least some common sense to operate at a basic level in this world, without which I likely would not have survived to this age. I also still struggle steeply with some logical "pressures", mostly the demands of the physical world to " do this, go here, be this way or ELSE." My rebellious self still resists this relentless "logical" push and too often creates an impasse for myself. I have never had the requisite physical stamina to fulfull all that.

This is certainly not the most brilliant of strategies to create a " successful " life (whatever the hey THAT is.) I have not had "success" but I AM a survivor.

I certainly seek the polar opposite of the outrageous, to soothe my soul and spirit. Raw and raucous and ugly is not what I want to look at. Clothing especially has too much focus of skin and not the mind. Attractive is fine but pushy is not. Sometimes I want to scream "please stop flaunting your body, women! Tone it down several notches, please. You are more worthy and better than that!" This is NOT “church lady” stuff, this is the reminder of the nobility of women, not the gutteral!

My realm of fascination with garments was birthed with my Barbie doll of childhood, as this doll dressed in RED VELVET and in embossed pink CHIFFON, for goodness sake. Gorgeous and otherworldly, those two dresses in particular, are lodged in my dear memory of the power of clothing. (Please note, I now have no red velvet or chiffon…)

Fashion to me, should not be about simply putting the body on "display " but rather a spark of visual inspiration . This comes via design, color, shape, texture and the wondrous flow of movement and sheer overwhelming presentation of things of beauty. This can be poetry spoken without words! An honorable garment can truly feed your soul and spirit.

Admittedly, daily life can be dull at times, with work responsibilities, the relentless juggling of time, money, family and friends.

We all need some sparks of light day by day, things that, without harm to self or others, nurture us and those who also might resonate with things, including garments.

For me, that is where the evocative nature of fabric and clothing comes in. I feel comforted with garments that are not revealing in any way. I do not have funds for fancy clothing...but I am grateful for the basics of pants and shirts and sweaters and scaves and earrings, and at some point, dresses and skirts again. As much as I love the great beauty of high fashion garments, I wear simple and functional clothing that is respectful of myself and God. I can enjoy the beauty of fashion from a distance and still be a conduit for God's mercy to the world.

Wendy Elizabeth Williams November 29, 2024

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