Thank you Wendy. I have been celibate for about 9 yrs. There is alot of peace in not being driven by lust. Like yourself, I fell for the notion of intimacy over the internet. It's a dark pit devoid of love. I really enjoyed your article. Thanks for your sharing, and honesty.
Thank you, Melanie! The Internet is certainly not particularly warm and fuzzy and certainly not often a place for deep intimacy. That is gained one to one. One day at a time for us all. Bless you! Wendy
Amen. Misdirected sexuality is perversion and blasphemy. Someone needs to have the courage to say this in a Godly way. Praise God for giving you the talent to do so.
Thank you, Charles! I do my best to share what is on my heart and all these things are based on my own difficult experiences, not just opinion. I went through much chaos and hopefully, my unpleasant experiences will be a beacon for others on “what not to do”! Bless you! Wendy
What's odd is that so called "conservatives" in the media are losing their minds over the fact that "young people between the ages of 18-30 are having less sex than ever". How is this a problem exactly? Back in the day the same conservative types used to cry over "pre-marital sex", "teen pregnancy", "out-of-wedlock childbirth", etc. Now, when all these things are lessening, somehow it's a problem?
Incel Theory, I am not in the media and I am not "losing my mind" about any of this. My writing is purely about what I myself went through in the utter chaos (VERY messy...) of my own youthful experience in the sexual revolution of the end of the 1960s and early to end of 1970s. It was a giant pile of marketing, especially to young women, about how great it is to be "free" and to have any sex partners you want and ignore the parameters placed before. I ignored them...to disaster, including two unplanned pregancies that sorrowfully ended in abortions in 1973, sexually transmitted diseases (gonorrhea, crab lice, trichomonas, jusssst lovely...NOT!), a broken heart more times than I could count, chaotic emotions, mistreatment by sexual partners, as if I was only a receptacle for sperm...and the very very shallow end of the pool. What I write in my recent piece is about spiritual warfare, not physical. I am not repressed...and God Himself created sexuality. He did not create it for entertainment, nor did He want people to be repressed or lonely. The covenant of marriage is designed to be a stabilizing force between husband and wife, to allow for sexual intimacy as well as the continuing of the human race. Pushing sex on young people is not the greatest idea. I lived it and it greatly damaged my life. Sex is a raw and primal power, to be used considerately and with parameters.
While respectfully, it is none of my business, I do not want you to be an "incel".
Involuntary celibate is not God's plan...although sexual chaos is also not God's plan! I had enough sexual partners (at least 50) to reap what I sowed...which was chaos.
I am not pushing any force on people, none whatsoever. I am simply a realistic survivor of the stupidity of my own Boomer generation, who fell for the devil's lies about how great "free" sex is. Take it from me, or not, it is NOT great. There are definite and unpleasant repercussions to rampant and unresponsible sex. I lived it, I watched dear friends die of diseases from it, I narrowly avoided dying myself!
My sincere and humble prayer for you is to meet a wonderful person , resonate with them, consider a lifetime partnership in a formal way and enjoy God's sexuality with them! Not at all easy, I failed at all of that...but at least I can be a beacon ahead on what to look out for...
"Incel Theory, I am not in the media and I am not "losing my mind" about any of this."
--- Did I say that you were?
"My sincere and humble prayer for you is to meet a wonderful person , resonate with them, consider a lifetime partnership in a formal way and enjoy God's sexuality with them! Not at all easy, I failed at all of that...but at least I can be a beacon ahead on what to look out for..."
--- Did I tell you this is what I want? Don't project your personal desires onto others. Many people are perfectly content with celibacy.
I spoke with many people who lived through the '60s and '70s "sexual revolution" and not one of them had nearly as wild of a sex life as you. I'm sorry you went through so much pain and suffering but I don't know that "the sexual revolution" is wholly responsible.
OK, Incel, not "projecting" my personal desires" onto you in any way. With you self-describing as an incel, which to my knowledge, means "involuntary celibate", that is something. I myself have been celibate a long time and am fine with it! The 60's had total chaos with the sexual revolution and for me and for many others, it was indeed 100% responsible, driven by music, peer pressure and marketing machine. I did not say all those in my generation did exactly what I did...but I lived it and up close and personal and that is what I write about, as a cautionary tale. I offer no "force", just my own direct experience.
Thank you friend. I too have battled with the spirit of lust for ages and have suffered greatly but it is nothing compared to the sufferings I have caused others. For this and for sinning against God I will repent the rest of my life for. I did not wake up one day and decide to be celibate. God brought me to it in a way I had no choice really. But mentally as you point out is also another thing and again God was merciful and has given and continues to give me His Grace. I have finally found the fullness of the faith and I am glad that it seems to be at a time I can accept it and participate in it. Prayers for all! Lord have Mercy!
Holly, many thanks for your kind comment! Dealing with lust is a very primal issue for so many. As I said in my writing piece, I am not scolding nor suggesting celibacy for people en masse but rather to consider our actions and ask God for help. God designed sex and is not against it but He does give honorable parameters to help us to stay safe and within bounds that will help our soul and keep us out of endangering situations, such as I went through as well. Godspeed to you as you partner with God and seek counsel from Holy Spirit day by day. How wonderful it is to have Advocates like this!! Bless you, Wendy
Bless you friend! I am glad you are speaking out and I believe it is very helpful for young people to hear “ a voice of experience”. I had a hysterectomy at 50 and did no go on hormones so although I have ages drastically having no “ whore moans”
Holly, age is very relative and your wisdom shines through! I got through menopause with NO pills whatsoever. At nearly 72, I am utterly through trying to "look young". I have common sense but I do not agonize over my age. I am not 21, and SO WHAT? I have earned my lines on my face and every single white hair. NO apologies. Enjoy youth, enjoy middle age, enjoy Elder age. As long as we hold fast to God, that is most important, as this place is temporary but God is Eternal! I do hope my voice of experience will help some young people, as I walked the same difficult path! No scolding here, just compassion and empathy. Wendy
Oops it printed and I wasn’t finished. Not having hormones though was a blessing in disguise because I was really just a slave to them when I was younger I had absolutely no idea how to control them and no reason to because I was godless. I pray always and admire so much young people who are struggling. God be with them!
Nurse Kristin, thank you!! I write about the darkness of what I went throught in the sexual revolution, to at least attempt to counter the marketing that goes on in 2024, about how fun the sexual revolution really is. Totally untrue for so many and at least I can verbalize what really went on and how damaging it all was to my Boomer generation and my attempt to shed light on it and bring the darkness into the blazing light. Funny, I had to think twice about including my Scorpio sign…as I do not follow astrology anymore…but I felt the archetype that “rules” the generative organs might have relevance to one who has chosen to be celibate! I enjoy your work as well, very much! Yay for Substack and Notes!!!!!
Thank you Wendy. I have been celibate for about 9 yrs. There is alot of peace in not being driven by lust. Like yourself, I fell for the notion of intimacy over the internet. It's a dark pit devoid of love. I really enjoyed your article. Thanks for your sharing, and honesty.
Thank you, Melanie! The Internet is certainly not particularly warm and fuzzy and certainly not often a place for deep intimacy. That is gained one to one. One day at a time for us all. Bless you! Wendy
Thanks Wendy for your encouraging words. God bless!
God bless you too!
You nailed it! Another great article.
Thank you, Joan! I appreciate your reading my work and your comments, they mean so much to me! Blessings, Wendy
Amen. Misdirected sexuality is perversion and blasphemy. Someone needs to have the courage to say this in a Godly way. Praise God for giving you the talent to do so.
Thank you, Charles! I do my best to share what is on my heart and all these things are based on my own difficult experiences, not just opinion. I went through much chaos and hopefully, my unpleasant experiences will be a beacon for others on “what not to do”! Bless you! Wendy
I get it!
What's odd is that so called "conservatives" in the media are losing their minds over the fact that "young people between the ages of 18-30 are having less sex than ever". How is this a problem exactly? Back in the day the same conservative types used to cry over "pre-marital sex", "teen pregnancy", "out-of-wedlock childbirth", etc. Now, when all these things are lessening, somehow it's a problem?
Incel Theory, I am not in the media and I am not "losing my mind" about any of this. My writing is purely about what I myself went through in the utter chaos (VERY messy...) of my own youthful experience in the sexual revolution of the end of the 1960s and early to end of 1970s. It was a giant pile of marketing, especially to young women, about how great it is to be "free" and to have any sex partners you want and ignore the parameters placed before. I ignored them...to disaster, including two unplanned pregancies that sorrowfully ended in abortions in 1973, sexually transmitted diseases (gonorrhea, crab lice, trichomonas, jusssst lovely...NOT!), a broken heart more times than I could count, chaotic emotions, mistreatment by sexual partners, as if I was only a receptacle for sperm...and the very very shallow end of the pool. What I write in my recent piece is about spiritual warfare, not physical. I am not repressed...and God Himself created sexuality. He did not create it for entertainment, nor did He want people to be repressed or lonely. The covenant of marriage is designed to be a stabilizing force between husband and wife, to allow for sexual intimacy as well as the continuing of the human race. Pushing sex on young people is not the greatest idea. I lived it and it greatly damaged my life. Sex is a raw and primal power, to be used considerately and with parameters.
While respectfully, it is none of my business, I do not want you to be an "incel".
Involuntary celibate is not God's plan...although sexual chaos is also not God's plan! I had enough sexual partners (at least 50) to reap what I sowed...which was chaos.
I am not pushing any force on people, none whatsoever. I am simply a realistic survivor of the stupidity of my own Boomer generation, who fell for the devil's lies about how great "free" sex is. Take it from me, or not, it is NOT great. There are definite and unpleasant repercussions to rampant and unresponsible sex. I lived it, I watched dear friends die of diseases from it, I narrowly avoided dying myself!
My sincere and humble prayer for you is to meet a wonderful person , resonate with them, consider a lifetime partnership in a formal way and enjoy God's sexuality with them! Not at all easy, I failed at all of that...but at least I can be a beacon ahead on what to look out for...
I bless your life! Wendy
"Incel Theory, I am not in the media and I am not "losing my mind" about any of this."
--- Did I say that you were?
"My sincere and humble prayer for you is to meet a wonderful person , resonate with them, consider a lifetime partnership in a formal way and enjoy God's sexuality with them! Not at all easy, I failed at all of that...but at least I can be a beacon ahead on what to look out for..."
--- Did I tell you this is what I want? Don't project your personal desires onto others. Many people are perfectly content with celibacy.
I spoke with many people who lived through the '60s and '70s "sexual revolution" and not one of them had nearly as wild of a sex life as you. I'm sorry you went through so much pain and suffering but I don't know that "the sexual revolution" is wholly responsible.
OK, Incel, not "projecting" my personal desires" onto you in any way. With you self-describing as an incel, which to my knowledge, means "involuntary celibate", that is something. I myself have been celibate a long time and am fine with it! The 60's had total chaos with the sexual revolution and for me and for many others, it was indeed 100% responsible, driven by music, peer pressure and marketing machine. I did not say all those in my generation did exactly what I did...but I lived it and up close and personal and that is what I write about, as a cautionary tale. I offer no "force", just my own direct experience.
I wish nothing but good for you. Wendy
Tough assignment, Wendy. But you've got this!
Jan, thank you! I never seem to get simple assignments… but I keep on writing! I look forward to your next writing piece! Wendy
Thank you friend. I too have battled with the spirit of lust for ages and have suffered greatly but it is nothing compared to the sufferings I have caused others. For this and for sinning against God I will repent the rest of my life for. I did not wake up one day and decide to be celibate. God brought me to it in a way I had no choice really. But mentally as you point out is also another thing and again God was merciful and has given and continues to give me His Grace. I have finally found the fullness of the faith and I am glad that it seems to be at a time I can accept it and participate in it. Prayers for all! Lord have Mercy!
Holly, many thanks for your kind comment! Dealing with lust is a very primal issue for so many. As I said in my writing piece, I am not scolding nor suggesting celibacy for people en masse but rather to consider our actions and ask God for help. God designed sex and is not against it but He does give honorable parameters to help us to stay safe and within bounds that will help our soul and keep us out of endangering situations, such as I went through as well. Godspeed to you as you partner with God and seek counsel from Holy Spirit day by day. How wonderful it is to have Advocates like this!! Bless you, Wendy
Bless you friend! I am glad you are speaking out and I believe it is very helpful for young people to hear “ a voice of experience”. I had a hysterectomy at 50 and did no go on hormones so although I have ages drastically having no “ whore moans”
Holly, age is very relative and your wisdom shines through! I got through menopause with NO pills whatsoever. At nearly 72, I am utterly through trying to "look young". I have common sense but I do not agonize over my age. I am not 21, and SO WHAT? I have earned my lines on my face and every single white hair. NO apologies. Enjoy youth, enjoy middle age, enjoy Elder age. As long as we hold fast to God, that is most important, as this place is temporary but God is Eternal! I do hope my voice of experience will help some young people, as I walked the same difficult path! No scolding here, just compassion and empathy. Wendy
Oops it printed and I wasn’t finished. Not having hormones though was a blessing in disguise because I was really just a slave to them when I was younger I had absolutely no idea how to control them and no reason to because I was godless. I pray always and admire so much young people who are struggling. God be with them!
Nurse Kristin, thank you!! I write about the darkness of what I went throught in the sexual revolution, to at least attempt to counter the marketing that goes on in 2024, about how fun the sexual revolution really is. Totally untrue for so many and at least I can verbalize what really went on and how damaging it all was to my Boomer generation and my attempt to shed light on it and bring the darkness into the blazing light. Funny, I had to think twice about including my Scorpio sign…as I do not follow astrology anymore…but I felt the archetype that “rules” the generative organs might have relevance to one who has chosen to be celibate! I enjoy your work as well, very much! Yay for Substack and Notes!!!!!
Nurse Kristin, hindsight always helps...through toil and trouble, each generation has to plod. We learn and we adapt and we keep on moving. Bless you!